“Hey Billy, do
you like Gladiator movies?”
June 6, 2016
By Bob Zettler
I love to hunt and
fish. No, let’s face it, hunting and fishing IS my life to a large
extent nowadays as I gave up on finding the right woman years ago.
So nowadays there are my children, who I love and am proud of, and
then there is hunting and fishing. And since it is nearly the summer
solstice, fishing is it till September 1 where I begin to go crazy
over hunting Early Canada geese and an afternoon shoot for dove. But
until then, it’s fishing. Period.
As such, I go most
every weekend and every opportunity that presents itself, whether it
is as the guest or host. And there is a big difference between the
two for when I am the guest, I arrive before they ask me to meet and
quit when they say quit. BUT, and that is a BIG BUT, when I am the
host I go as long as I can physically stay awake most times and that
will tax most anyone else in the world for they have family
commitments, jobs and the need for sleep…
I have been
ridiculed for my 19, 20, 21 hour trips over to Lake Shelbyville where
I will fish from a late afternoon or early evening, into the night
hours and then go after those Crappie until either I catch my limit
or just cannot see the water. I tell people who join me that they
can come and go as they choose for they do not have to “stay the
course” and beat themselves up on one of my expeditions. And, I
have had a number of people join me where they come late or leave
early and this has worked out for it suits us both. And then there
was Craig…

Fast forward to this
weekend where Craig had just gotten out of the Army and wanted to go
with me over to Lake Shelbyville so I told him he could join me for
whatever time he wanted and he wanted it ALL. So we made plans to
meet up around 10 PM on Saturday and we would be responsible for our
own food and beverages and I would get minnows and catfish bait and
he would try for some bluegill and shad. I tried to sleep but a
pesky cold and multiple phone calls and texts over the afternoon
interrupted my slumber. We met at Leprechaun Landing where I keep my
boat at 10 PM and readied ourselves and the watercraft before getting
on the water well before 11 PM.
With searchlights
ablaze, GPS(s) leading the way, we motored up the lake from Wolf
Creek to near Point 6, maybe 4 or so miles in total darkness, sans a
few stars. I told him to never tell my kids I do this for they would
freak out. I mean, boating in total darkness after a rain using only
searchlights and my GPS’s at nearly 30 MPH – they would either
commit me or take away my keys! Anyway, we made it there unscathed
and discovered others were already there so we tried the island
nearby and discovered that the wind the weatherman had said would be
light was…shall we say, not, which made it near impossible to keep
the jugs off the shoreline. Decided finally to head into a nearby
cove and set my 25 floaters with cut shad and chicken livers before
boating over to the local marina area where it was lighted and held
some fish.

As it was now
breaking daylight, we went after Crappie with a vengeance and I put
us on one of my spots where we began to catch them! We caught a lot
but very few keepers with most being in the 8-9” range but a couple
of Overs did make their way onto our hooks. After a couple of hours
we decided to head over to the Coalshaft Bridge area but discovered
the winds we had been fighting all night were even worse there and
with no other boats trying their luck there I reached out to Brian
for help.
Brian Cleland is
quite possibly one of the nicest guys you will ever meet and has
helped me since before we even met in person. Brian quickly replied
and sent me tips on where to look and amazingly, I found them! And,
we were on Crappie again – a lot of Crappie – but where I could
do no wrong at our first spot and had added several fish to our
catch, nothing was going right here. With snags, broken lines, and
all, I was spending most of my time at getting untangled, unsnagged
or replacing lost gear. But Craig came up with the idea that if we
had an anchor then maybe it would be easier. DUH! I have two
anchors! So we get one out, motor past the spot and I drop anchor
letting the line glide through my hands and into the depths. Did I
say glide? I meant RIP through my hands as it had a hook stuck in
the rope and as I wasn’t wearing Kevlar, well let me say the
experience wasn’t one I wanted repeated!
Yet, after the blood
was washed off the bow, I was back on the fish and…you guessed it,
getting tangled, losing gear and getting wrapped up in ropes, lines
and the like but I still managed a Crappie or three. After a couple
hours and nearing Noon, I asked him what he wanted to do, expecting
him to say how good a tall, cold Coors would be right about then but
he surprised me by saying let’s try the other spot! Que sera,
sera. Can’t this boy get enough!
Onto that spot and
another anchor drop and you guessed it, another shredded hand palm,
as I had taken out the one hook, I found another! And Jeez Louise,
we…I mean Craig, began catching Overs all the while I am trying to
stem the blood loss and get myself untangled and the like. By Noon,
the winds were tougher and now the pleasure boaters were out and we
had a good number of fish but the minnows were down to a couple of
dead ones – I had been using the dead ones AND still catching
Crappie – so I asked Craig what was his pleasure and he shocked me.
I thought he would say it had been a good time and let’s head for
the Hills for a cold Coors. Instead, he said we could stop by the
Marina, buy some more minnows and try the spot we had started off at
before heading back to the ramp. Now, as most who know me, that is
usually what I would say but this time it was another and I was the
vict…I mean, the one ready to be done. Somewhere I was quite sure
pigs were learning to fly…
Onto the Marina
where we pick up another batch of minnows, as we had already gone
through more than 10 dozen, and back at the first brushpile where
roles are reversed again and I am catching fish while Craig is trying
to get untangled. Stayed at it for awhile and finally decided to hit
those other spots we had last been at before calling it a day. While
we found the one spot, I really had problems finding the other and
then the winds were truly a pain in the posterior. Yet, we managed a
couple more keepers and then ran out of the second batch of minnow!
I mean we went through maybe 200+ minnows and were just shy of a two
man limit of Crappie but the killer was I had been ready to call it a
day four hours earlier!!!
With the jigs losing
their effectiveness and not even a dead minnow in the bucket (I had
resorted to using the dried ones that had fallen on the boat’s deck
several times already), Craig finally said we could call it and it
was well after 5 PM the day after we had begun our expedition. Wow.
Just Wow!

Yet, nearly 21 hours
on the boat was enough and while I had been feeling great on the
boat, it truly hit me once I walked on shore. With another 90
minutes to home for me, I set off and made it to my driveway shortly
after 8 PM whereupon it took me a full five minutes to get myself out
of the van and in the front door, leaving a trail of clothes in my
wake and the fish on ice as I collapsed into my bed.
It had been a great
time but I felt like I had been vanquished for I had never been so
tired IMHO. And when that chicken I ate on the way home decided to
make its emergency exit from my bowels at midnight and I wasn’t
sure I could sit upright on the throne, I realized Craig was right
that eating chicken on an empty stomach after it having sat out all
afternoon wasn’t such a good idea. So while it might have appeared
like a tie and that this old man outlasted the young Army Gladiator,
I am now just not so sure about that…
Anyway, thank you to
Brian, Shawn and all the rest who assisted me on our expedition and
welcome home for Craig. God Bless everyone (but not a couple of
ex-wives)!
Nice read Bob ,,except for the poopy parts
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