Is there a cure for Cabin Fever?

By Bob Zettler

February 28, 2015

I have been climbing the walls the past three-plus weeks here at home.  I started out the 2015 Conservation Season for Light Geese with a trip down to Arkansas that my friend – yes, I still have a few – John Nolan set up last fall for February 5-7.  Hell, I was excited but had even wanted to head down the weekend before as the past two waterfowl seasons and been abysmal for me personally.  Between health issues, freeze ups, lack of birds and no one to hunt with, I was primed!

Then it hit me, February 7^th.  The first Saturday in February for most but it also was my daughter’s 30^th birthday.  Man, oh, man do I feel like crap!  I mean some of the hunt was free but I did pay for half of the three days…would she understand?

Call me a terrible Father but I went…

And while it was great company and times with old and new friends, the Snow geese just did not cooperate.  For three days in Arkansas during what in normal times would be prime, we killed 14 the first day, four the second and 16 the third.  Should have been more on the third but you know who had issues hitting birds but that’s another story for another day.

So, we came home and my daughter still talked to me but once again fate intervened and winter finally hit Illinois.  And hit it with a vengeance.  For all the Illinois Snow goose hunters, I don’t have to tell you how bad it’s been.  Between sub-zero temperatures, to snow every freaking weekend, our February portion of the season seemed doomed.  It was to the point I was ready to head back to either Arkansas or the Bootheel of Missouri if need be just to get a crack at them but even that was not an option since they too were experiencing the same, damn cold and snow!

So here it was the last weekend in February and we might have a line birds south of St. Louis but I would have to head there Saturday to scout and hopefully not only find some birds but also secure permission…sure!  Then I am dealt another blow when as I was having the oil changed the Friday night before, I am shown that my front wheel bearings were out and needed to be replaced…to the tune of $1100.  Looks like heading south is now out of the question...

So on Saturday, I decided to rummage around the home, cleaning and making basically more of a mess.  And of course, watching the weather as the snow was once again headed our way and the forecast was for a pretty bad one this time, from southern Illinois to our neck of the woods here in west-central Illinois.  Just my luck…

My attempt to clean got old pretty quick, so around 3 PM I thought I would at least head south and take in the country before the storm hit but the snowflakes were already dropping before I left the driveway wearing just sweatpants and a t-shirt.  Yet, I headed south and sometime later out of the blue (and white) I was driving past a field covered in those SOB’s!  As I almost run off the road on the ice and snow, I find a side road and just soak up the scene.  I mean NO ONE had seen any geese to speak of for the last 10 days in my area and here I was just tooling along and there they were, THOUSANDS of them!!!

So, as I sit in my Jeep and take in the fields of SOBs as far I could see, the snow begins to fall in earnest almost obscuring the nearest farmhouse where the geese seem to be headed towards.  I decide to take a chance but not before calling my hunting buddies.  However, the one is headed to his girlfriend’s and the other believes these are the same stale, old birds that have been around for weeks, sticking it out through all this miserable, cold, no, frozen weather…

As I head up their drive, I can see the birds getting closer and closer to their out-buildings.  Now I am pumped.  As I was carrying several video cameras to loan to my daughter’s fiancé, I just hope they would allow me to at least video and that is what I asked the son when he answered the door.  However, it seemed my Dark Cloud was about to part ways for a short while when he came back and said his Father had told him to tell me, “Video them?  Hell, kill them all!”  As luck would have it, I was carrying and (of course) had plenty of ammo!!!!

After asking the young man to pinch me (that almost ended my hunt right there) I quickly made my way to the Jeep and drove over to the out-buildings.  I dragged out the whites, loaded two shotguns – hey, I always carried one with me just in case – and made my way to the first shed.  As I walked over, the closest birds got up but that left a bunch on the other side of the shed.  At first, I thought a good game plan would be to simply make my way alongside the one shed to where I would patiently wait for my opportunity…

By now it was nearly 4:30 and I had almost two-hours of hunting left but with my luck who knows what will happen.  These truly are adult birds.  Birds that have been shot at for the past eight months and have survived more seasons than some of our younger waterfowlers have been on this earth.  And here I was sitting in a shed on a bucket that I had found and turned over with a plank of wood for a seat.  And these, old, smart and crafty birds were feeding their way right towards me!  Dark Cloud my ___!

As I had already shied some of the birds off when I made my way into the open shed, and while I have patience on occasion, when these birds got within maybe 30 yards and I could spot no dark geese of any kind in the mass in front of me, I decided to step out from my vantage point, click the safety off and commence to lay as much waste as I possibly can!

Now I had mounted the Contour Roam 2 on a new picatinny mount which held the video camera farther up my Beretta Xtrema 2 and had been concerned how it would hold up under a shotgun which could throw upwards of 11 shells in seconds but it was of no concern as I rose and pulled that trigger till I ran out of shells.  Now my heart had been racing in anticipation of just this moment and I was out of breath when the shooting ceased and saw the dozen-plus birds dead or dying.  Hallelujah!  The drought was over but now the chase was on…

I took several steps towards them and decided to take a knee and simply take it all in.  It was almost too much as I had simply headed out from home an hour earlier and now here I am having to gather up my prey.  Prey that I had given up hope for during the last month.  As I dispatched the wounded close by, I tried my best to chase the ones headed out and away.  And while I wish I could report that I was successful in my efforts, I could make out at least five that were almost to the next road 1/5 mile away but I created piles as I worked my way around since I was afraid that I would lose track of them in the falling snow since visibility was getting worse.

All of a sudden, I realize I am maybe a couple hundred yards out in the field and the geese have not left and were actually coming back around me.  What the Hell, let’s go for another round!  I saw some cornstalks still standing, albeit, they were less than a foot tall, but they might just provide some additional cover.  At least I was wearing snow camo and, hey, it was snowing!  So I lay down in the snow and waited…

Again, it was one of those moments where you…I mean, “I” just want to soak in the experience.  I mean, 90 minutes earlier I was tooling down the road trying to lessen the impact of cabin fever and the lack of opportunity for these wile birds, and now I am lying in the middle of disked cornfield in the snow with thousands of SOB’s flying around and dropping in next to me.  Life can be good…

Within minutes, I had birds on three sides of me.  And since I was worried about screwing the pooch and hitting a Speck or Canadian goose, I had to choose the best group of pure white birds in front of me.  It was time as I could not wait any longer as the snow was increasing and I had already had one group get up en masse just as I was about to pull the trigger.  Hey, I have patience but a man must know his limitations.  This time the birds were a little farther but not an unreasonable distance.  And when I was done, there were a dozen more either dead, dying or crippled but more were crippled and my chase was on – again.

Unfortunately, the cripples were more than I could handle and probably more than I could chase down in the harvested made it out into the snowy fields in front of me.  Yet, I gathered up those I could.  Piled them up and then began crisscrossing the field trying to find any stragglers.  While I was not prepared for my jump shoots, and had hoped just to at least harvest a few, I was elated to bring home 18 but if the snow lets up I will be back out there in the morning to see if the cripples survived the night and make one last stab at collecting them.

My work was not done though for now I had to figure out how to drag all the birds, my shotguns (the one still did not work) and I back to the Jeep before I got stuck in my host’s yard.  I took my unloaded guns back, grabbed a flashlight and something I could wipe the frost and snow from my glasses - In this case, it was a pair of men’s boxers I had in my overnight bag.  A man has to do what a man has to do!  Oh, and I grabbed a dog lead which I used to tie up as many of the birds as  could and in this case, drag them back to the Jeep.  Improvise and adapt.  Improvise and adapt!

By the time I was back at the Jeep it was now dark and the snow was really coming down but at least I had my boxers to keep my glasses clear every now and then.  And what a sight I was!  I had ice throughout my windswept hair and looked like Jack Nicholson at the end of The Shining!  I made my way to the farmer’s home after cleaning up a bit and expressed my deep gratitude for their understanding and allowing me to end the drought and give my morale a boost.  Good people.

And as I made my way home on roads where even the 4WD vehicles were going just 30 MPH, I just had this smile on my face that had not been there for some time.  A smile that was made possible by strangers, chance, patience and by not giving up. Dark Cloud my ___!